The day my kid got his first tablet.

The day my kid got his first tablet, I am saying first, because you know these things do not last, was a perfect day.

So, today, my 3 years old boy got his tablet, it wasn’t something he asked for or something he has seen at other kids and decided he should definitely have one. No. Just the parents decided it is time to stop harassing mom’s old laptop and get the kid his own device. After his nap, we surprised him with this great invention, but the only reaction he had, was a smile. I mean the kids these days don’t even get surprised anymore with such gifts. I guess he was trying to say “wow another device to destroy or huh, is this a new phone? because i have moms already…”.

Anyway, the family picture right now looks this way: the kid is absorbed into the tablet, asking from time to time for snacks, I got my rights on my very own old laptop and the father is in front of his computer, playing wow (nothing changed here).

So, there are some advantages getting the kid his own device:

  • first of all, no more violence ))) I mean I had to fight for the laptop, sometimes ))
  • everyone is happy
  • more free time for mommy
  • you can take it anywhere

And finally, our kid does not spend his entire day with the tablet, he goes to kindergarden and also thank God for this invention.


We live in a world where:

We live in a world where:

  • a 30 years old woman is taking make-up classes from a 15 years old boy from Alabama, on Instagram
  • an 8-hour office is old-style and online sales of a lip pump is so freaking cool
  • women refuse to have children because they don’t have time for the little nipple suckers
  • fewer kids go to college because they are memes experts
  • we make lame stories, bestsellers and then spend more money to watch the movie based on that, still lame, story.
  • we still cannot understand why two women or two men can have a great life together.
  • people can take photos of everything, expect of ….nothing…there is no mystery anymore.
  • we believe in green vegetables, which come in a plastic box from China.
  • we give to a 2 years old kid, a tablet, as a gift, so that the mommy can have free time for the Instagram stories.
  • grammar rules are for pussies, ’cause u aint real dis way.
  • we still buy things we don’t need, with money we don’t have, to impress people we don’t like. (Fight Club).

soon 3 years…

Soon my son will be 3 years old. Now I can say that these were the fastest passing by years. I always thought that university was quick, but no, watching a kid grow is like flashing moments and wow we need bigger clothes.

Some of the rules I have learned during these time:

– your kid is the best in the world, even if he is constantly an asshooole
– you can never love your child too much
– never buy clothes that fit him just right, you’ll need bigger ones in a week
– never cook more, hoping he will eat more. He doesn’t and will throw all away.
–  do not buy small toys, by the age of 3. not only because he can choke but also because you will step on them all the time.
– do not buy noise toys, they teach nothing just make you angry.
– let you kid eat by himself only when he is ready, 1 years old cannot control themselves
– let him play outside
– do not make the child’s room a sauna
– kids love sweets but teach them to wash teeth
– no Lego by the age of 5
– always keep the medicine hidden
– do not smoke in front of them
– play with them don’t just pretend to do it or staying in your phone
– let them play alone, they need space as much as adults
– no lies, after the age of 3, he understands more than you know
– explain things, do not make him shut up every time he asks something.
– be patient, he will ask the same thing 1000 times
– enjoy every moment around him

Being a parent is very hard, but also it teaches you to be kind, play, smile and always be grateful.

kind of a story

Ea nu isi contura sprincele cu creion. Uneori le mai aranja cu miina uda, dupa dush. Aveau forma naturala conform cerintelor din ultimul Vogue.

Azi a imbracat fusta lunga maro si unicul tricou curat. E abia Joi, iar loundry day avea sa fie abia Luni. Noroc ca avea 8 perechi de underwear. La micul dejun si-a prajit 2 oua in tigaia din care venea mirosul de becon, prajit ieri. Chiar daca cineva i-a zis ca fructele mai bine sa fie o mincare aparte, a mincat si un mar, ca sa mai distruga din gustul de ulei. Ieri plouase si sandalele ei stateau murdare si aruncate in colt, le sterse in graba in timp ce se uita dupa un elastic prin casa. As usual, si-a prins parul in timp ce cobora cu liftul. In transport, tinarul de linga ea, a citit o pagina din kindle-u sau. Mirosea a tigara, proaspat terminata inainte de a se urca in troleibuz.

Ajunsa la lucru si-a facut o cafea trei in unu, pe care desigur a baut-o doar pe jumate, si-a amintit ca defapt nu ii place asa bautura. 3 pahare de apa mai tirziu, lucru deja era interesant. La pauza a avut o chifla cu magiun, doua defapt si un ceai negru, care l-a baut pe tot, iar la sfirsit a mai turnat niste apa fierbinte peste pachetelul din cana. Azi primise salariu, deci ii zimbi sefului cind acesta o saluta linga lift seara.

In drum spre casa, si-a deschis din nou cartea electronica si fetele din jur disparuse. Un miros proaspat de tigara o trezise incet din calatoria imaginara. Dimineata nu observase ca el are tenisii murdari de la ploaia de ieri.

Ajunsa acasa isi pregati niste pasta cu unt. Dupa ce termina de citit penultimul capitol, un miros usor de tigara intra prin geam. A strins hainele de aceasi culoare maro, si masina de spalat se porni pentru 30 minute.

Being the only mom in your squad

  • Ohhh, i will never let my kid do this and how can you let him dress like that..
  • I think you should let the kid cry, this way he will understand that he was wrong…
  • Why don’t you take a part time job, while on your maternity leave?

How many times have you received “good parenting advises” from friends who don’t even consider having kids any time soon.

Being the only mom in a group of single-still engaged-freshly married girlfriends is hard and funny. Funny, because hearing someone, who had 2 martinis after some draft beer, telling you that parenting is so easy and I should not make such a big deal of it, is hilarious. How, how can this lady give me advises, when she babysit for an hour, once, 10 years ago. The only advice I can accept from her is where I can find the best sales or how to make margaritas using only vodka.

Also, it is hard to have girlfriends which are still size 2 and continue dating like they are 21, it is hard to explain to them, that any plans you make now, on how to be the best mom, will crash eventually. She’s convinced that reading “What to expect, when you’re expecting” is more than enough to raise a child. Good luck and see you on the other side of maternity island!

Meanwhile, it is hard to keep up the outfits they are wearing, because you only know the best places to buy organic food and big boxes of diapers. You thing that leggings and a large flower blouse with your old nikes is a fabulous outfit.

I never had the chance to give parenting advises, as I was the first to have a child in our group and I don’t consider myself the best mom but I can change a diaper and put the baby to sleep faster than you’ll make your margarita using only vodka.

So, please do not teach a mother, how to do things, until you’ve had a little one of your own, smiling at you every morning.

Babies and Luck (English version)

How often do you think of your child as “Wish we had you a little later”, “Because of you, bye-bye career ” or ” Now I have to wait till you go to sleep, to have that glass of wine”. If you don’t have these thoughts, you are not lucky, you’re just ignoring them.

If you had your kids in your 20’s, your life is so much different than it could have been. At the beginning, you are so enthusiastic and feeling blessed (it really is) but then you have your shirt painted red and nothing clean to go to the work in the morning. And the next morning you see that the dog is eating out of your favorite mug, because you know, he asked for it. Suddenly your wife’s texts are all about diapers, formula, wine and tampons and you think where are those long, hot midnight msg? And forget about crazy monkey sex, now its just quickies so we could get enough sleep. In the same time, you start speaking sarcasm as a native language. Your kid is wearing the pot as a hat and you don’t mind because you have the same hat. Grandma doesn’t have to know about the missing china, she already knows about the expensive glasses she found in the washing machine. And actually, you are so happy when she agrees to babysit, so you have finally the chance to open that bottle of whiskey and eat with your both hands.

There will be many days when you think “Why, why didn’t I use a condom that night” but then you see that little kid peeing on its own and you start feeling blessed and enthusiastic and really, really lucky.

La maternitate

Dupa 9 luni de dormit doar pe spate, vreau capsuni la 5 dimineata, tu nu ma iubesti deloc si uite ce de grasa sunt, vine si ziua cind hai sa nastem. Suni la urgenta, intre timp te gindesti ca ar fi o idee buna sa te machiezi, totusi e sarbatoare, si o sa vrei foto sa faci. Drumul pina la spital e o adevarata cursa de formula 1 si o sa vrei medalie sa sfirsit ca nu ai nascut chiar in ambulanta. Ajunsa la maternitate, esti intrebata “Pe cine sa chemam?”. Tu ridici o sprinceanca, in timp ce te mai incearca o contractie mica, cele mari abia vin si intrebi “Ce?”. Domnisoara asistenta, cu inele de aur pe fiecare deget, manichiura de un rosu aprins, iti raspunde pe datorie, “Si nu ai medicul tau?. Ceea ce inseamna sa te intelegi din timp cu un medic obstetrician, ca, in ziua nasterii, el lasa tot si vine sa asiste la nasterea ta, desigur in favoarea unei sume de citeva sute euro. Ei bine, tu esti cazul care nu are medicul sau. “Bun dar, stai aici, sa vad cine e de garda” zice iar pe datorie, asistenta cu ukladka. Tu stai cuminte, nu de parca ai sa-i zici “nu, gata, eu ma duc acasa, sa nasc in baie”. Pina ajungi in sala de nasteri, iar indeplinesti un sir de foi, intre timp deja iti pare rau ca te-ai machiat, pentru ca arati ca o panda in calduri.

Linga sala de nasteri, esti intrebata unde e tatal copilul si daca vine mai tirziu iti dau indicatii in care cabinet sa vina initial. Multumirile se cer mai des de la tati.

In sala de nasteri peretii sunt roz si totul e steril, te bucuri putin. O viitoare moasa, te roaga amabil sa te asezi pe un pat alaturi de cel pe care defapt o sa nasti. Pe acel pat se intimpla jumate din chinul care urmeaza. Dureri care niciodata nu ai crezut ca corpul tau le poate simti. Si cind crezi ca nu poti si vrei sa cedezi, durerile se maresc, deci esti gata sa treci pe adevaratul pat de nasteri. Aici ca in poveste, petreci vreo 5 ore. In tot acest timp, esti rugata sa nu strigi, ca nu esti la discoteca si multe alte indicatii care te atentioneaza ca ai venit sa nasti si nu la dansuri.

Totusi, viitoare mamici, prin toata durerea care o simtiti atunci, incercati sa auziti medicul, el stie ce zice )

Si iata momentul, atat de mult asteptat, un omulet mic, zbircit si verde este pus pe burta ta. Si toate chinurile, taieturile si lacrimile tale parca nici nu au fost. Esti Mama.